Voici Paris...

So, finally, here we are, in Paris.

I have been very quiet on the blog lately. I wish I could say that I was busy preparing for our move to Paris, but I was not. Work took up a big chunk of my time, as always, but our Chinese New Year week-long break in KL was also a great excuse for procrastinating.

After a mini debacle at the French Embassy in Singapore (it's their way of welcoming me to France), we finally got our visas (only the halfway point to becoming fully legitimate residents of France), I finally got around to packing (and a good 80 kgs of it) and we finally arrived in the City of Lights (and romance, and fashion, and blood-boiling bureaucracy, and non-existent customer service) last week.

The Eiffel Tower again? Why is it everywhere??

Sophie & YL accompanied me here, also in part to hunt for an apartment. We were not successful.

We are not fussy people. We have simple needs. We just want somewhere with character but clean with modern comforts. Creaky floors in a 200-year old apartment I can take, walking up 3 floors without an elevator is part of life, but not kitchen appliances that belong to a previous decade or two, bathtubs and showers that are caked with calcium deposits, and kitsch furniture. So let's hope flat number 14 will be the one.

In love with Paris already

Sophie enjoyed herself thoroughly: squealing in delight at every sight, skipping along the cobblestone pavements, and practising the few French phrases she knew over and over and over again on me.

"Je m'appelle Sophie. Comment tu t'appelle?"

"Comment allez vous?"

This is a huge change from the indifferent and uninterested Sophie of 4 years ago when we lived in Europe. Of course, she was also barely 2 then. The short of it was that it was a very encouraging sign to see her embracing her new environment so thoroughly. We will have lots of fun together, mon cheri!

In the meantime, I will be here alone for the next 2 months, missing my 3 fireflies back home very much, and counting down the days till I return...

Bon courage!

First Transaction

Me: Je voudrais acheter des timbres en Singapour.
Post-office staff: Oui. Combien?
Me: Deux.
Post-office staff: Un euro soixante quartoze.
Me: (Hands over money). Merci.

My first French transaction. It took me a little bit of preparation before approaching the post-office counter.

Sigh!...This is going to be one long, slow, tough ride...

Get me off the bandwagon!

This is what the start of my nightmare looks like.

The white stacks are past-year exam papers from top schools in Singapore. There is a very lucrative business here selling these sorts of things. These 3 stacks for Primary 1 Mathematics, English, and Chinese Mandarin cost $35.

Mathematical word problems.

Dictation. In Chinese. (Help!! YL & I are hopeless bananas*...)

Spelling tests.

Our family is packing up (again) to our next nomadic destination, Paris, in a few months' time. Sophie is supposed to join a school there which uses the International Baccalaureate programme. She should be learning through self-directed exploration, pointless creativity, experimenting with things in her environment, etc - all the stuff of new-age, stress-free, experiental learning.

But since she will return to the pressure-cooker, rote-learning school environment of Singapore in a couple of years, we could not simply sit back and enjoy this scenic route during our time in Paris. So, off we went to the Popular bookstore this weekend to stock up on all the Mathematics and Chinese books we could fit in one large book bag, to ensure that she will be able to follow the super-advanced Singapore syllabus and re-integrate upon her return.

It is a stereotype of the "Western-style" of teaching that it does not place as much emphasis on Science and Mathematics as they do on language and the arts. We have yet to establish whether this is a well-founded stereotype but let's not take any chances, shall we? Not if she is going to return to an environment where their Primary 1 Mathematics questions are equivalent to what I studied in Secondary 1. YL? He's not much better...

Me: "OMG...! Look at these Mathematics word questions. Did you know how to answer these at Standard 1??"

YL: "No. Because I couldn't read at Standard 1."

So after a few days of grieving and bemoaning our fate, we dried our tears and cleared the cobwebs off our rusty brains, and reluctantly hopped onto the kiasu parents bandwagon. Anyone has the Primary 1 2009 past year exam papers to give away?

* bananas - A euphemism referring to people of Chinese descent who are English-educated and cannot read or speak Chinese. Yellow on the outside, white in the inside.

The end of my (blissfully) ignorant days...

Sophie is slated to start Primary 1 (or Standard 1 as we call it in Malaysia) next year. You would think: aah but that's a whole 365 days away, so relaaaaax...

NO. Not in Singapore. In Singapore, any parent worth their salt would start planning their child's first year of primary studies immediately after the child is born. This is because in order to get their child accepted into any school with reasonably decent results in Singapore's national examinations for primary school children, they will have to either (1) own a flat smacked right across and in full view of the school, or (2) be related to the Prime Minister, or (3) be a billionaire able to donate funds to build a new 50,000 sqft school assembly hall, or (4) have the luck of a gambler who strikes the lottery regularly. Preferably all 4 criteria.

(Apologies, I was not being honest there.

Item 2 does not actually get you the coveted spot, not unless the Prime Minister was an alumni of the school. And item 1 only works maybe 50% of the time. You need item 4 to go along with it. So I guess only item 3 really buys you the guarantee. Pun intended.)

So they need 6 years in which to (1) work 3 jobs to earn enough to buy a flat near the aforementioned schools, or (2) stalk the Prime Minister in hope of becoming his friend, or (3) cheat, lie or steal to become a billionaire, or (4) attend church/temples regularly to pray for luck.

And of course, I just started thinking about all these, oh...just 6 months before registration day. Oh yes, no problems at all, Sophie will just end up attending the neighbourhood school for hooligans-in-the-making and speak rojak (mixed) English and pasar (marketplace) Chinese and not be able to add two numbers when she graduates.

.....

OK, OK, so I am a little hysterical here!! I am traumatised by my discovery of this whole new world a few weeks ago.

• "What? Volunteer for a minimum of 40 hours within 6 months at the school to get a shot at balloting for a spot?"
• "What?? I have to compete with 67 other parent volunteers and be interviewed to check the suitability of my skills?
• "What??? I'm not even guaranteed a spot after that???"
• "What?? I missed the deadline which was 6 months ago???"
  

And just up to that few weeks ago, to me, these terms were simply alphabets strung together. They had no meaning.

balloting
parent volunteers
Phase 2C
affiliated clans
within 1 km
SAP schools (contrary to what it stands for - Special Assistance Programme - it actually refers to schools that offer advanced Chinese starting from Primary 1)

Today they are my nightmare.


After 2 weeks of trawling the kiasuparent website, I am now somewhat able to explain to other gloriously oblivious parents about the various phases of the Singapore Primary 1 registration system. And trust me, after so many years of dealing with resourceful, creative, and wily parents, the system is well-oiled and all loopholes are plugged and sealed with cement. You are resigned to obeying the system and hope for the end to come quick.


* Hokkien term referring to someone who is afraid to lose. A stereotype of Singaporeans, but I think deep inside we are all kiasu, Singaporeans or not.

Merry Christmas!

Ho Ho Ho, everyone!

No, I didn't post the wrong photo...It beats a Santa outfit, doesn't it ;)

Cycling at East Coast

After many weeks (or maybe it was months...? hmm...maybe years...) of slothful weekend behaviour, we rounded up the kids early this morning for a round of cycling at the East Coast park next to the beach.

Sophie took this picture for us. She spent some time composing it, so I didn't crop out the sign on the right. Maybe she wanted it to be part of the picture?

Our stylish little cyclist

Look Baba!! Look at the BIRD!!!

The Doctor and his brood, after a tiring morning of exercise.

(OK OK, so it was only 30 minutes....but everything is relative).

We rewarded ourselves with nasi lemak, chicken rendang rice, and garlic toast. Yum yum...

Busy at "work"

For those who were wondering what I do when I travel to Europe for "business", here's a hint...

Don't ask.